maayacolabackup | Kpop: Rub You the Wrong Way (Kris/Minho, NC-17) [crack]

Title: Rub You the Wrong Way
Pairing: Minho/Kris (SHINee/EXO)
Rating: P is for porn
Summary: Minho and Kris are selected for 'SM the Rapper'. Then there's porn. (1k)
Notes: Help me, I'm sick. (this is crack crack crack) For Sarah, obviously. This isn't even a bingo square FML.

The project comes down from Lee Soo Man at the worst possible time. Minho is excruciatingly busy, wrapping up 'To the Beautiful You' and making appearances with his band at what feels like every event ever.

Still, anything, Minho thinks, is better than watching Jjong try to con Taemin into anal, while Jinki pretends it isn't happening and Kibeom watches inappropriate videos on his mobile phone and tries not to touch himself.

Those short-shorts of Kibeom's, Minho thinks, don't really help.

At least, Minho had thought anything would be better, but then he finds out that the other half of SM's new cross-group project 'SM the Rapper' is going to be Amber's pet-project, Kevin Li, or Kris as he calls himself these days, and he thinks he'd almost rather watch Jjong try to get to third base than spend more time than necessary with the most useless addition to SME since pension plans.

Minho doesn't need a pension plan, and he sure as hell doesn't need Kris.

Minho is pretty sure he could have fronted 'SM the Rapper' all on his own, without this newly debuted upstart and his mediocre Korean. Kris, Minho thinks, is terrible at everything. At least Minho can sort of dance, and is devastatingly good looking. Kris doesn't contribute much of anything to 'SM the Rapper' except his one eyebrow, and Minho is hesitant to call that a contribution. Minho's manager mentions something about 'English', but Minho's watched enough Ludacris videos to know what Kris speaks around the set for 'To the Beautiful You' isn't exactly street.

So Minho's not quite sure how he ends up in the bathroom with Kris after their first (disastrous) day of recording with Kris's hand around his cock and Kris's lips frantically attacking his neck, and, well, enjoying it.

"Fuck, Kris," Minho says, as his fingers fumble with the button to Kris's jeans. "Or Kevin. Whatever the hell your name is."

"You can call me duizhang," Kris says, and Minho bets he thinks he sounds suave, but really he just sounds like a massive jackass. A massive jackass with his massive hand around Minho's well, massive cock though, so Minho supposes Kris does have a contribution or two to make to 'SM the Rapper'.

"Not a chance in hell," Minho hisses, and he finds Kris's mouth, not bothering to be gentle. He just sucks Kris's lower lip into his mouth and bites down, and enjoys the way Kris growls and jerks him harder.

Minho finally gets into Kris's jeans, and he takes both hands and shoves Kris's stupid, too tight underwear down to mid-thigh. "For a big guy, not much going on down there," Minho says, and Kris laughs, too sharply, and lets go of Minho's cock, sliding his hands behind Minho's back and grabbing onto Minho's ass, squeezing too hard, or, in Minho's opinion, not hard enough.

"Shut up," Kris says, and he kisses Minho again, lifting him up and putting him on the sink counter.

"No way in hell you're fucking me," Minho says, and the counter is cold under his bare ass. He would very much like Kris to continue jerking him off, but he supposes fair is fair, and he wraps his own hand around Kris's erection. He pushes back Kris's foreskin with his thumb, and then presses that same thumb to the slit, dragging precome down the underside of the shaft and reveling in the shudder that wracks through the other man.

"You've got such a big ego," Kris says, voice even lower than usual, and Minho laughs as he kisses down Kris's jaw angrily, leaving raised hickeys along his neck. It doesn't matter. People will just think they're pimples once the coordi-noonas slather on enough BB cream to choke an elephant.

"Well if that isn't the pot calling the kettle black," Minho replies into Kris's clavicle, and Kris groans and then brings his hand up to his mouth to spit.

It's a much smoother glide along Minho's cock, this time, and Minho licks along Kris's collarbones in appreciation, picking up speed as he slides down to the base of Kris's cock and then back up, faster and faster until Kris is panting into his shoulder. Minho is finding himself short of breath, too, as Kris focuses on the head of his cock, circling the tip with his sweat slick palm.

"Guess you aren't completely fucking useless," Minho says, and then he comes, swearing obscenities into Krus's sternum as he feels Kris spilling onto his hand and forearm.

Kris's face is flushed as he pulls back, a dull red that goes from his cheeks all the way down to his neck, and Minho can see his marks decorating the other man's chest where his super fussy blouse or whatever is unbuttoned.

"You either," Kris mumbles as he turns on the faucet.

"Although next time, I suppose I should do you in an airport," Minho muses, as he slides down off the counter and pulls up his trousers. "As I've heard that's where your talents lie."

"You're pretty smug for a man who skipped puberty," Kris says, turning off the water and doing up one more button on his lady-shirt. He runs his hand through his overbleached blond hair, which is plastered to his forehead with perspiration.

"At least I didn't need puberty to become publicly acceptable," Minho fires back. "And I've got a baby face but a man's body. Best of both worlds, to be honest."

"If you say so," Kris says dubiously. "See you on set tomorrow." He leans over and kisses Minho's forehead, like that's okay. "It'll be fun to watch you kiss a girl."

"Shame you're such a dick with nothing to back it up," Minho says.

And then he's gone, and it's Minho's turn to look in the mirror and wince. To his dismay, he's a bit red himself, and he feels the laziness of sexual satisfaction in his muscles, leaving him warm and flush.

Perhaps, he thinks, as he zips his trousers and adjusts his t-shirt, this whole "rap duo" business won't be so bad after all, if it comes with these sort of 'no-strings-attached' benefits.

Later, he feels even better about it, especially considering he's getting more ass than Kibeom.

Considering the sheer size of Kris, Minho might be getting more ass than anybody.