maayacolabackup

—

“Well, here we are,” Jongin says uselessly, folding his hands into the covers of Minseok’s bed. Lu Han is across from him, sitting on his own bed, just studying Jongin through his lashes. Those, Jongin thinks, are dark, and Jongin feels the urge to run his thumb along them, and see if they tickle.

He’s not really sure if that’s the kind of touching he’s allowed, though, so he stays on Minseok’s bed and fidgets. “I—”

“Yes?” Lu Han says, and just the invitation in his voice makes Jongin choke on his own saliva. He’s so filled with want it seems criminal, and Jongin’s never really had to make the first move. Lu Han seems content to watch him until he does, though, so Jongin presses his feet to the ground in preparation to stand up.

There is a knock on the door. “Not naked or anything?” It’s Minseok, Jongin thinks, his heart beating faster even though there’s nothing incriminating about what he and Lu Han or doing right now. It’s the worst kept secret in EXO that they...do stuff, anyway, so it wouldn’t have mattered much if he’d walked in to Lu Han’s lips around his cock.

Jongin is so hard.

“You can come in!” Lu Han replies, and the door opens, Minseok peering in.

“Jongin, why are you on my bed?”

“We’re talking, Minseokie,” Lu Han says, smiling serenely. “Does it look like we’re doing anything else?”

“No...” Minseok says, eyeing them both suspiciously. “But I know you, Lu Han, and—”

“Did you need something?” Jongin asks desperately, and Minseok straights, and blinks. “Right, right, I need to protect my baby.”

“Your baby?”

Minseok reaches out with both hands to reverently pick up his autographed JJ Lin album from the bedside table. “Yes,” he coos. “My beloved. I refuse to have it defiled.” He glares. “Or ruined by wayward sexual fluids.”

“Hyung!” Jongin shouts, and Lu Han just laughs. “It’s not that—”

“Don’t worry, Jongin, I know you’re working on it,” Lu Han says, and Jongin looks over at him with hopeful eyes.

“What is that expression on your face?” Minseok clutches his album closer and moves toward the door, rolling his eyes. “Jongin, you’re like an overeager, obedient little puppy. This one here,” and he points at Lu Han, “needs a little bit more of a grown man, sometimes, too, you know.”

“Oh, go sleep with Kyungsoo or something, I’m sure he’s lonely without someone jizzing on his face at night,” Lu Han says, giving Minseok’s ankles a gentle kick. Minseok yelps and jumps out of Lu Han’s legreach.

“Duizhang’s the one that likes facials,” Minseok says. “It’s a shame the public thinks it’s a beauty routine.”

“Goodbye,” Lu Han says dismissively, and Minseok chuckles as he closes the door behind him. He pauses, when it’s only open a crack.

“Don’t you dare have sex on my bed,” Minseok says, and Jongin squeaks out an ‘okay’ as the door closes.

“Hyung, you think he’s right, don’t you?”

“About what?” Lu Han asks, undoing his his top shirt button. “About you being an obedient little puppy or about me needing a grown man?” Jongin’s silent. “Well, you do follow instructions well—”

“I—” Jongin licks his lips. “I know. I do. Don’t get me wrong, hyung, I like it, and I’m thankful you’re helping me out with everything, but...”

The rest of the words Jongin wants to say don’t come out, so instead Jongin pushes Lu Han down onto the bed and straddles him, before taking his mouth in a deep kiss, tongue sliding easily between Lu Han’s pliant lips and tasting toothpaste.

Lu Han doesn’t say anything, just reciprocates, deepening the kiss. This is good. This is what, Jongin realises, he’s been craving. Lu Han’s kiss is warm and romantic, and reminds Jongin of all those sappy dramas that Zitao likes to watch in the living room—scenarios and cheesy scenes that he’d scoffed at before, but had secretly wanted. Lu Han hadn’t prepared champagne or roses that night in Jakarta, but tonight feels like a night that can change everything around.

Lu Han bites down on his lower lip, and Jongin lets his tongue linger there. Jongin takes Lu Han’s shoulders. Now he wants, more than anything, to hear Lu Han moan even half as loud as he had under the torture of Lu Han’s hands and mouth. He wants this, and he wants Lu Han to want it too, and—

“Can I...” Jongin starts, and then he pauses, mustering his courage. “Would you let me...”

“Let you what?” Lu Han purrs, and Jongin almost loses his nerve, but then he thinks about his dream and how nice it might feel to make Lu Han shiver in the same ways Lu Han had made him shiver, and he steels himself.

“Let me be in charge instead,” he murmurs, into the sweaty skin of Lu Han’s neck, and Lu Han’s hand, which had found its way into Jongin’s hair, tightens its hold, yanking hard enough that Jongin has to muffle a whimper against Lu Han’s throat. “Let me—”

“Alright,” Lu Han says easily, before his voice drops lower, breath whispering against the shell of Jongin’s ear. “So take charge then, Jongin-ah.” Jongin shifts, his erection pressing into Lu Han’s belly, because even though Lu Han is saying yes, his words still sound like a command. Jongin still wants to follow it.

“Okay,” he says, sliding a hand up Lu Han’s shirt, skating along his ribs and lingering in the dips and valleys of his abs. Lu Han’s skin is so soft beneath his fingertips, and even though it’s not what he wants to do, if there’s one thing he’s learned from Lu Han, it’s the benefits of taking his time.

He carries Lu Han’s shirt up with his hands, and Lu Han lets a moan escape from between his lips. Then his presses his mouth together, which makes Jongin kiss him at the corner of his mouth.

“You like it when I beg, right?” Jongin asks. “Well, I like it when you—” Jongin runs his tongue over his teeth. “I like it when you make noise. I like to hear—” He pulls Lu Han’s shirt over his head, then tosses aside his own. “You. You know?”

“That’s fine,” Lu Han says, lightly scratching at the thin, sparse trail of hair that leads down from Jongin’s belly button. “Undress me faster and maybe I’ll get louder.”

Jongin’s fingers drop to the fasten on Lu Han’s jeans, undoing the button quickly and dragging them and Lu Han’s underwear down to mid-thigh, baring his half-hard cock. Jongin thinks it isn’t fair, the way Jongin is five seconds from coming undone and Lu Han is just watching him with a lazy smile and twinkling eyes. “Fine,” Jongin says, with as much bravado as he can drum up, and then he scratches along Lu Han’s hip bones, lightly, just hard enough that Lu Han will remember he’s been there but not hard enough to leave a mark. “Can you—”

“If you want to be in charge,” Lu Han says, “you’d better take the control.” His hands both reach upward, one to Jongin’s collarbones and the other to lie cupped around his neck, thumb moving back and forth like a reminder that Jongin might as well be collared with how obedient he is to Lu Han’s every command.

“Right,” Jongin says, and then he licks his lips and gently runs his finger up the vein of Lu Han’s penis. Lu Han’s breathing hitches, and so Jongin spits into his hand, before making a circle with his index finger and thumb around the base of Lu han’s cock, and stroking up. Lu Han moves into the touch, getting harder in Jongin’s grasp. Jongin does it again, adjusting his pace and hold based on the noises Lu Han makes, and Jongin likes the way Lu Han tells him without words which things he likes best, like when Jongin’s palm pushes back at his foreskin to rub across the sensitive head, or like when Jongin’s thumb taps at the slit. “Kick your jeans off.”

Jongin moves to give Lu Han space, and he sort of expects Lu Han to take advantage of Jongin no longer pinning him down to switch their positions and take over, but he’s gratified when Lu Han doesn’t, instead just lying back down on the bed, arms resting innocently at his sides.

And Jongin is kind of at a loss.

It’s not like before, when Jongin just had to follow Lu Han’s lead. Now it is Jongin who has to say what comes next, and Jongin just wants to make Lu Han happy. “What do you want?” Jongin asks, and Lu Han looks at him with luminous eyes.

“What do you want?” Jongin licks at his lips.

“I want to kiss you again,” Jongin says, and then he does, crawling up Lu Han’s naked body and claiming his mouth. Lu Han can’t help but take over the kiss, making Jongin whimper without even moving one of his hands. Jongin feels himself on edge, heavy and swollen in his underwear, and he breaks the kiss just to tear his shirt over his head. “I want to kiss you more, now.”

Lu Han laughs and doesn’t say no, so Jongin crushes their bare chests together and worms out of his bottoms as his tongue drags across Lu Han’s small square teeth. Lu Han’s mouth is just so hot, and Jongin feels like he’s melting.

“I want to lick your nipples,” Jongin says, and as he slides down, his now uncovered erection slides against Lu Han’s, which makes Jongin bite down hard on his lower lip. It’s only made worse at Lu Han’s restrained hiss, which sends all the blood in Jongin’s body down to his cock. He feels lightheaded as he sucks one of Lu Han’s nipples into his mouth, rolling it carefully between his teeth before lapping at it with a flat tongue.

“Good boy,” Lu Han says soothingly, petting Jongin’s hair. “Good boy. What else do you want?”

This probably isn’t how you take control, Jongin thinks, as wryly as he can when he’s so fucking aroused and feeling like he’s been about to come for the past five minutes. It’s probably all wrong, but Lu Han’s hips are lifting unconsciously off the bed toward Jongin’s, and Lu Han’s fingers are carding through his hair, and Jongin is getting to take the time to explore Lu Han in a way he hasn’t gotten to yet, so maybe this is all he wanted, anyway.

“I want to fuck you,” Jongin says, making his voice low and rough. Lu Han’s whole body shivers, and Jongin likes that. He likes that a lot. “And I want you to like it.”

“Jongin-ah,” and Lu Han curls his fingers into Jongin’s hair, “you’re just full of surprises tonight, aren’t you?” Jongin isn’t sure whether the breathlessness he hears is because Lu Han wants this too, or if because Lu Han is laughing at him, but Jongin dips his tongue into Lu Han’s navel, his chin bumping the head of Lu Han’s cock, and Lu Han’s groan doesn’t sound remotely like laughter.

“I—I just want to make you feel good. Hyung, tell me what you like. Please.” Lu Han deserves it, after putting up with Jongin and all his hesitation—it’s time that Jongin did something for Lu Han too, and that’s what Jongin himself wants as well, so...

Lu Han looks at Jongin, who’s mindlessly running his thumb up and down the vein along the underside of Lu Han’s shaft, and Jongin flashes hot under his gaze. “How much do you want to try tonight, Jongin-ah?” Lu Han asks. His words come out jagged as Jongin replaces his thumb with his lips. “Just how many surprises are you going to give me?”

“As many as you let me,” Jongin says, taking the tip of Lu Han’s cock into his mouth before going down further, until it makes him gag, his throat constricting around it. He pulls up a little and Lu Han removes his hand from Jongin’s hair to clasp at the comforter instead.

“Jongin, stop,” Lu Han says, and Jongin immediately lifts his head, a thin line of saliva connecting Jongin’s mouth to Lu Han’s cock. “You’re so pretty and so obedient,” Lu Han says. “One of a kind.”

Jongin closes his eyes, and tries to pretend that those words aren’t exactly what he wanted to hear.

Lu Han leans over his own and drags the bag out from under the bedframe, and Jongin opens his eyes again at the sound of the zipper. “Use this,” Lu Han breathes, rummaging around inside his toy bag and pulling out a leather strap with nine thin cords attached to the end. Jongin hesitates, before taking it in his hand, curling his fingers around the rough material of the woven handle.

He can vaguely guess what it’s for, but to be safe—“What’s this?”

Lu Han quirks an eyebrow, smile playing on his lips. He sits back down on Minseok’s bed. “Pretty obvious, isn’t it? Or have you never watched porn before?”

“Well,” Jongin purses his lips, “uh, I never really needed it to...”

“Right, right. It’s—you can whip me with it.” Jongin takes the cat o’nine tails, running a finger down one of the thin leather cords, eyebrows furrowed. He rolls the knot at the end between his fingers. It would probably hurt, a lot, if Lu Han wants...to be lashed with this. Lu Han closes Jongin’s hand around the worn whip handle and pushes it towards Jongin. “Take it.”

“Okay,” Jongin says, hands shaking. He grips the whip tightly and gives an experimental swish, the knots of the cords flying around and catching on his own arm by accident. He winces, the sharp stinging pain spreading in tingles over his skin, marked red. “I’m not sure how to—”

“Gentle flick with your wrist,” Lu Han says. He rolls onto his stomach. “Whip my back with the knotted tips of the cords.”

“Won’t I hurt you?”

“If it gets too much,” Lu Han says, “then I’ll...serenade you in Spanish.”

“What?” Jongin blinks. “Hyung, you don’t even know Spanish.”

“Me no gusta,” Lu Han sings in a barely passable accent. “Senorita.” At Jongin’s growing apprehension, Lu Han smiles reassuringly. “Jongin-ah, don’t worry. It’s safe. You’re not going to hurt me,” he says, “and honestly, I would probably like to be hurt.” He must see Jongin’s eyes widen at that point, because he stops, cheeks flushed. “That’s...er, we can talk about that. Later. Just...you want to be in control, don’t you?”

Jongin runs his hand down Lu Han’s back, skin pale and unmarred. On one hand, he kind of...does want to do this. How thrilling it would be to leave lashes and swollen red bruises and marks there—almost like marking his claim and territory? Jongin wants Lu Han to be his, and his only. It wouldn’t be so different from those bruises and scratches that Lu Han had left all over his body all those times, Jongin supposes—and if Lu Han likes pain, then that’s exactly what Jongin will give him.

So Jongin tightens his grip and flicks down tentatively. The cords land on Lu Han’s back, but only very gently, and Lu Han hums in disapproval. “Harder. You need to bring it down faster.”

“I think—”

“Jongin-ah, don’t think, just do.” He’s heard this sentence so many times from Lu Han already, and as a good student, he should remember it. Jongin squeezes his eyes shut and flicks his wrist downward sharply, drawing his arm back just before the whip hits Lu Han’s back, so that only the tips gather enough momentum to leave a series of angry slaps across Lu Han’s skin. This time, Lu Han hisses sharply, trailing off into a groan. “That’s the way.”

The marks redden and swell up. Jongin runs a finger over them, pressing down, feeling the slightly raised flesh, before he brings his arm up again, striking down harder than he had the last two times combined.

Lu Han lets out a cry, the muscles of his ass and thighs tightening visibly to brace him from the pain, and the angry marks on his back have multiplied. Jongin lashes twice more, feeling a callous excitement building up inside him, before he sees that Lu Han has the sheets between his teeth and tears in the corner of his eyes—

“Oh my god,” Jongin says, hastily setting the whip aside. “I—hyung, you’re crying—”

“I’m fine,” Lu Han insists, but Jongin’s lost what little courage he’s built up, and Lu Han must feel it too, because he takes Jongin’s hand in his and squeezes it gently. “It’s okay, Jongin-ah, you’ve done well. You’ll get more comfortable with practise.”

“Yeah,” Jongin mumbles. He ghosts his fingertips over the thin welt lines and red markings on Lu Han’s back, bending over to lick them. There’s a slight metallic tang in his mouth—probably from the one or two lashes that had broken through skin—but it’s manageable.

“You’re like a puppy licking at wounds and hoping they heal,” Lu Han remarks, turning around. Jongin’s eyes travel down to Lu Han’s cock, and he feels a thirst parching his throat when he sees that Lu Han is as hard as before and there’s a new sheen of precome glistening at the tip. Lu Han strokes Jongin’s face, forcing Jongin’s gaze back up to his flushed face, then pulls Jongin down and kisses him, slipping a tongue between Jongin’s lips. Jongin can feel Lu Han’s heartbeat thudding against his chest from where he’s now lying flush on top of Lu Han. Lu Han shifts, and then their erections are touching. “That’s so cute.”

“I want—” Jongin gulps, sliding up and down so their cocks are rubbing together. He breaks their kiss, putting a hand flat on Lu Han’s shoulder and keeping him down. He’s been assertive thus far, so surely, he can—“I want to be inside you.”

“Do you want me on my hands and knees so you can stretch me?” Lu Han offers, reaching a hand down and stroking their cocks together with one hand. “Or do you want me with my legs spread apart and slung over your shoulders so you can pound into me?” But even as he says this, he takes Jongin’s right hand with his free hand and spreads his legs apart, bringing his knees up to his shoulders, and presses Jongin’s fingers to the stretch of skin between his balls and his entrance. “There’s lube in the bag.”

Jongin takes Lu Han’s prompt and scrambles to fish out the lube, flipping open the lid. Lu Han’s still stroking himself with slow, loose strokes, and Jongin tips the bottle upside down and squeezes some of the lube onto Lu Han’s balls, letting the viscous liquid drip down until it reaches Lu Han’s hole. Lu Han moans and clenches as the lube makes its way inside, and Jongin feels his cock throb in anticipation.

“H-hands and knees,” Jongin commands, like he’s not insanely nervous. Lu Han smiles and flips around, bracing himself on elbows and spreading his knees shoulder-width apart. “I’m going to put my fingers...”

The first press of his finger to Lu Han’s entrance has Jongin hesitating. “You can do it,” Lu Han says, like he’s trying to ease Jongin into loosening up around his digits rather than convince Jongin to slide his finger in. Jongin’s in control here, physically, but it’s still Lu Han giving him the instructions and coaxing Jongin. “Don’t you remember how it feels?”

Jongin does. The steady push of the pads of Lu Han’s fingers into his prostate until he’s too dizzy to see, to speak, to breathe. He definitely remembers, and that gives him the courage to slide in. He’s done this to himself, but never to someone else. There’s more mobility like this, with Lu Han on his hands and knees, and Jongin explores, shifting his lubed finger in circles and pressing against every bit of Lu Han’s walls to cherish the foreign tightness. The pants from Lu Han as he crooks that single finger help too, and soon he’s adding a second finger, and a third, as Lu Han’s arms shake with the effort of holding himself up.

“I want to put my cock inside you,” Jongin says, when all three of his fingers are sliding in and out of Lu Han’s ass with ease, and Lu Han’s squirming underneath him. “I’m going to fuck you so hard, hyung.”

“Yes, good boy,” Lu Han breathes, and the pride and satisfaction coursing through Jongin probably shouldn’t get him so giddy or make him feel so satisfied and hard, but he is, and if Lu Han’s willing to indulge him like this, then he really might be able to go through with this all the way. “Good boy, Jongin.”

Jongin can’t take it any longer. He wraps a hand around his cock, gripping the base in a tight circle like Lu Han had taught him, clenching his pelvic floor muscles to stop himself from exploding the moment the head of his cock touches Lu Han’s ass, and positions himself at Lu Han’s entrance.

He thrusts.

Lu Han is warm and impossibly tight around him, and Jongin very nearly loses himself there and then, thighs shaking, before he squeezes his muscles, forcing himself to hold back, and he’s teetering less precariously on the brink. He recovers enough to give another few shallow thrusts, hands gripping Lu Han’s thin hips hard enough to bruise.

“Harder,” Lu Han says, rocking his hips back onto Jongin’s cock, and Jongin pulls out and draws the motion out, until his entire length is sliding in and out of Lu Han at a building pace.

“Xiao Lu, do you remember which of these lubes ended up not being edible—oh.” Kevin has his hair pushed back from his face with a stretchy headband, and he’s holding two industrial sized bottles of lube in his hands. “Okay just real quick, Lu, the ‘Hot Licks’ or the ‘Liquid Silk’?”

Jongin thrusts again, almost by accident, his hips moving of their own volition, and he digs his hands into Lu Han’s hips to keep Lu Han from thrusting back. “Oh my god,” Jongin says, and he thinks it’s amazing that he doesn’t spill right then at the rebellious squeeze of Lu Han’s muscles.

"Ken, please, can't you see we're busy?" The betrayed expression on Kevin's face would have made Jongin laugh, were he not moments away from coming, cock buried in Lu Han's ass.

“Lu Han, how could you?” Kevin says, voice catching, and Jongin leans forward, resting his chest against Lu Han’s back. The movement makes Lu Han shudder and clench around him, and Jongin whimpers into the sweaty skin. “You, of all people—”

“Not now,” Lu Han says, and his arms are shaking, so Jongin wraps one of his around Lu Han’s waist to help hold him up. Lu Han’s ass shifts against his pelvis, and as soon as he hears Kevin close the door in a huff, Jongin withdraws and then slams back in, causing Lu Han to suck in a lungful of air and then cry out. “Stupid Keith, I thought he’d never leave.” As he speaks, Jongin can feel him fluttering around him.

“You like it when people walk in,” Jongin gasps accusingly, and Lu Han hangs his head.

“Maybe a little,” he replies, in a jumbled mess of words, sounding as spent as Jongin feels.

After that, Jongin loses track of anything that’s not the smooth slide in and out of Lu Han, or Lu Han’s filthy moans as he asks Jongin for it harder, faster, and Jongin struggles to comply, sweat pearling on his back and getting into his eyes as he rolls his hips.

Lu Han comes with a guttural sound that pulls Jongin kicking and screaming down into orgasm after him, and they fall into a pile of messy limbs and panting breaths as Jongin slips out.

Irrationally, Jongin tugs Lu Han closer to him, plastering themselves against each other in the mess they’ve made of Minseok’s sheets underneath them, and it doesn’t matter, because it’s so thrilling to feel Lu Han shaking in his arms, for once as wrecked as Jongin himself.

“Good boy,” Lu Han says, curling his fingers around Jongin’s wrist, lips brushing Jongin’s cheek. “Very good boy.”

“Minseok-hyung’s gonna kill us,” Jongin mutters, stroking up Lu Han’s arm. “We did it again on his—”

“Then we’ll both die,” Lu Han decides. “Together.”

Lu Han sounds touched out, and Jongin can’t resist turning his head just enough to catch Lu Han’s mouth in a wet, open mouthed kiss. Lu Han allows it for a few moments before he takes over, guiding Jongin into something more structured, tongue to teeth and cheeks as Jongin drowns in the heat of Lu Han’s mouth. I really, really like you, Jongin thinks, as he pulls Lu Han’s lower lip into his mouth, the way Lu Han had taught him, the first time they kissed.

“I like your penis,” Lu Han says, when they part. “I’ve decided to name it Crong.”

“You’re ruining the moment,” Jongin says breathlessly, and Lu Han laughs.

“Are we having a moment?” he asks, and Jongin nuzzles their noses together.

“I refuse to have my penis be named Crong,” Jongin replies, and Lu Han kisses his chin, missing Jongin’s mouth in his dizziness. “You know the letter ‘r’ is challenging for me.”

“You say that like you’re going to be talking to your own dick,” Lu Han teases. “Shame on you.”

“You can’t say the letter ‘r’ either,” Jongin points out, and Lu Han laughs again, before smothering him in sloppy, overzealous kisses that lack structure or style. Jongin thinks...that he likes Lu Han like this.

Later, as Lu Han curls into Jongin’s side, one of his hands digging possessively into Jongin’s hip in a way that’s sure to leave bruises, it all of a sudden dawns on Jongin that he’d only come twice over the course of Lu Han’s ministrations. Lu Han twists, throwing a leg over Jongin’s, cold toes scraping at the opposite calf, and Jongin carefully, hesitantly, kisses the crown of Lu Han’s head.

Lu Han stills, and Jongin thinks maybe he’s made a mistake, but then he feels Lu Han’s smile against the skin of his neck, and he wonders if he can stand to graduate from this program, these lessons that Lu Han’s giving him, or if in the end, it will break his heart.

—

It’s a rehearsal for ‘Two Moons.’ It’s Jongin’s first real test since Lu Han’s, well, training, and Jongin’s not sure what will happen.

Jongin bites his lip as the music starts, and Chanyeol cackles a bit before lifting his mic to his mouth. Jongin slips into the familiar movements of the dance, moving past Kevin and smirking at Yixing. He focuses on the movements, and on the music, and on breathing the way Lu Han had showed him.

When the music ends, and Jongin’s pants are mercifully dry, and he hadn’t even been close to the edge, Jongin feels a wave of triumph.

He can’t wait to tell Lu Han.

“Congrats,” Chanyeol says, as Kevin resolutely refuses to look in his direction. Jongin isn’t sure why; there are so many reasons that Kevin should want to avoid Jongin’s gaze, but Jongin is sure it’s none of those reasons, and probably something petty, instead, like blaming the presence of Jongin’s cock in Lu Han’s ass for Lu Han calling him ‘Ken’. “You no longer ejaculate at three seconds’ worth of sex talk or accidental touches. We should throw you a party.”

“Oh wow, I despise you,” Jongin says, scrubbing at his face in mild embarrassment. “Really, I do.”

“We could hire strippers,” Chanyeol says. “We should ask Kevin if ‘Ace’ is available.”

“He isn’t,” Kevin replies with a glower, and Yixing winks at Jongin as he slips out of the conversation, in an attempt to avoid the crossfire. Jongin gulps and follows suit, leaving the two tall men to argue it out over whether Chanyeol joking that he wants to undress Kevin’s alpaca is funny or not.

—

“We did ‘Two Moons’ today,” Jongin says, when Lu Han answers the door, and Lu Han’s eyes widen as he pulls Jongin into his dorm.

“And?” Lu Han says, his hand still wrapped tight around Jongin’s wrist, dragging him back toward Lu Han’s room.

“Nothing,” Jongin says, excited and tense. “Nothing happened. I remembered everything you told me and nothing happened. Thank you.” He looks Lu Han in the eyes. “Seriously. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Lu Han says, and he pats Jongin lightly on the arm. “Glad to have helped.”

Jongin really wants to kiss Lu Han, or really, for Lu Han to kiss him—throw him back against the wall and take his mouth, the way he’s become accustomed to. But Lu Han just sits down on his bed, dropping Jongin’s wrist and gesturing to the space in front of him.

That’s when Jongin realises. He’s cured. There’s no reason, he thinks, for Lu Han to kiss him anymore.

“So I guess this is it,” Jongin says, sitting on the floor by Lu Han’s bed, because Lu Han’s still particular about letting anyone sit on his bed. “You’ve taught me and now we’re done.” The words are sticky in his throat. He digs his fingers into his thighs so Lu Han won’t see them shake.

“Well—” Lu Han is quiet for a moment, and Jongin waits for the confirmation. Lu Han’s just trying to figure out how to let Jongin down easy, Jongin figures, because maybe he can see Jongin’s hesitance to give up the way Lu Han’s fingers feel gliding across his skin and the way Lu Han’s cock feels in his mouth.

“It’s okay,” Jongin says quickly, looking down at his toes. “I know this was all...You were just being a good friend. A good teacher. Trying to help me. For the band, right?”

“Hmm,” Lu Han says, and it’s amused, so Jongin’s head jerks up because there’s nothing funny about Jongin’s quavering voice. “But now that I’ve gotten you all conditioned, it would be a shame to break in someone new.”

Jongin blinks, and tries to figure out what Lu Han is saying. “Wait, you want—”

“I mean,” Lu Han says. “I wouldn’t mind if this continued.” Lu Han crosses his arms, staring down at Jongin from his higher perch, and his hair falls into his eyes. His lips look soft, too, and Jongin remembers tracing the scar to the right of them with his tongue. “There’s no pressure, of course. We could just end things here—”

“No!” Jongin squeaks, and then he stubbornly keeps his hands from flying up to cover his face because he’s had Lu Han’s cock up his ass, so he shouldn’t be embarrassed by a few unexpected words between them. “I mean, I would like that.”

“Oh, thank god,” Jongdae says from the doorway, and they both look up to see Jongdae cradling his Chinese textbook as he and Yixing pass by what Jongin realizes is the open door to Lu Han’s room. “Now you can both stop moping.”

“Kim Jongdae,” Lu Han says pleasantly, “are you not as attached to your testicles as I had previously assumed?”

“Both?” Jongin whispers, turning back to Lu Han in surprise. Lu Han isn’t blushing, but his mouth is tight, the way it gets when someone calls him pretty on television and everyone agrees; a grudging embarrassment mixed with rage. It makes Jongin’s heart do this girlish fluttering in his chest that he would never admit to, even at gunpoint.

(The thought of Lu Han holding him at gunpoint, though, is kind of hot, and maybe they can explore that later. Then there’s another giddy trill as he realizes there is a later.)

“Welp, that’s my cue to check out of this conversation,” Jongdae says, holding his crotch and disappearing down the hall.

“Lu Han, you finally got what you wanted,” Yixing says obliviously, walking further into the room and sitting next to Lu Han on the bed, ignoring Lu Han’s scandalized fury. “I’m happy for you.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Lu Han says, dismissively, but Jongin leans forward to rest his head on Yixing’s knee. Yixing pets his head gently.

“Lu Han’s always wanted you. Even predebut,” Yixing informs him, unaware that Lu Han’s hands are lifting as if to involuntarily strangle his best friend.

“Liar,” Lu Han hisses. “Jongin, don’t listen to him, he’s full of lies.”

But Jongin knows Yixing, and he knows Lu Han too, and he feels an embarrassed but pleased flush crawling up his face and settling into his cheeks. “That’s okay,” he mumbles. “I always wanted you, too.”

“Well, I’ll leave you two alone,” Yixing says, and exits, closing the door behind him. Lu Han shifts on his bed, smoothing the spot on his duvet where Yixing had sat, and Jongin clears his throat.

“So,” Jongin says, looking up at Lu Han through his eyelashes. “Does that door lock?”

“Yes,” Lu Han says, sliding down to the floor and landing on his knees. He threads a hand through Jongin’s hair, pulling him close enough that their mouths just barely brush. Jongin can feel the softness of Lu Han’s pink lips against his own, and Lu Han’s breath, sweet and hot. “But we’re not going to lock it.”

Jongin shivers, and Lu Han undoes the top button of his fly. “But what if someone walks in again?” Jongin whimpers, and Lu Han’s hand casually drags across the waistband of his briefs, dipping lower with each pass. His words press like a kiss to Lu Han’s mouth.

“We can only hope,” Lu Han says, and Jongin surrenders to Lu Han’s games, just like he’s been taught.

—

They play their games: they switch between Kai and Lu Han, the faces of EXO, during the day, and Jongin and Lu Han, when the cameras are off and they’re back in the dorms for the night. It’s what they all do, what they all have to do, but for the first time in a long time, Jongin’s content with this façade, because he knows, at the end of the day, he’ll have Lu Han to take care of him, and teach Jongin more about his own body than he ever learned in a ballet or jazz class.

Plus, Lu Han’s into so much kinky shit that Jongin’s usually too trapped in one of Lu Han’s various scenarios to even think about coming without Lu Han commanding him to, which puts an end to a lot of Jongin’s former problems and leaves him in very strange positions when Lu Han is in China. (Phone sex, Jongin is coming to find, is not half as bad as he’d thought it would be.)

During SM Town Bangkok, Jongin makes sure to stuff two condoms into Chanyeol’s hand when he tries to snatch Jongin’s water bottle. “For you,” he says, when Chanyeol holds up one of the condoms to the light. “Baekhyun might want to warm up his vocal cords.”

Kevin chokes on his water, and Minseok looks wryly amused.

“Classy, Jongin,” he says, and Jongin shrugs. “Maybe that should be the subject of your next lessons, since Lu Han finds you so teachable.”

The show goes well, despite the rain that has them tripping and falling, plastering their clothes to their skin and leaving them breathless with mascara in their eyes. Before Jongin can blink, it’s ended, and they’re doing the encore.

Lu Han, whose face is shiny with sweat, make-up melting off under the stage lights making him look a little rougher; a little less like a doll, is smiling as he and Yixing pour water over everyone’s heads, catching Jongdae off guard and then swallowing him up in a hug. Baekhyun is doing something really sketchy with Chanyeol that makes Jongin think maybe Baekhyun had warmed up his vocal cords after all.

Their eyes meet across the stage, and Lu Han approaches him slowly, never dropping Jongin’s gaze. Jongin flashes hot, then cold, and he can feel arousal, but he can also feel a different sort of tightening in his lower stomach, that might be...

When Lu Han reaches him, he lifts up a pair of toy deer antlers and sets them on Jongin’s head, smiling as he adjusts them.

“You’re mine,” he says, and Jongin nods, giving Lu Han a small smirk.

“Yeah,” Jongin says, “I am.”

Lu Han sits next to him in the van on their way home, their thighs pressed together, and Jongin is...he’s really happy.

After the show, all of EXO pile into the lounge on their floor of the hotel. The whole floor is full of SM artists, so they’re not afraid of making noise. Jongin is sure they’ll see at least one drunk member of Super Junior running through the halls within the hour. If they’re unlucky, they’ll see six of them, and they’ll be naked. Joonmyun won’t mind, as long as Kyuhyun is one of them.

“Aww, you two look so happy,” Chanyeol coos as they scramble for the comfortable places, and Jongin hits him with his rescued teddy, pushing his antlers back up and scowling. “Domestic bondage bliss, I’m sure.”

“Chanyeol,” Jongin says, as the members all settle in various spots across the lounge. Jongin spreads himself out on the couch, to save enough room for Lu Han, who downstairs on the first floor at the convenience mart with Joonmyun bringing up the last of the snacks. “Do you ever shut up?”

“Why should I?” Chanyeol chortles gleefully, eyeing the teddy bear speculatively. “Doesn’t Lu Han have a thing for plushies—”

Jongin flushes before frowning in an attempt to mask his embarrassment. “It’s none of your business—”

“Oh my god,” Chanyeol exclaims, almost flying out of his seat and hitting Jongdae in the face with his arm in the process, “he totally does, you—”

“Look,” Jongdae says, stealing glances at his phone, where he has undoubtedly saved at least five pictures of Amber during her solo parts in ‘Like a G6’, “some of us aren’t getting laid right now, so if you could just—” Chanyeol is laughing, so Jongdae lifts a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. “Do you really want to laugh right now, Chanyeol? Do you really? Cause if you do, I’m going to ask what you were doing with those ears of buttered corn and a live ferret last weekend, and—”

“He’s sorry,” Baekhyun says, desperation in his tone. “He’s really sorry.”

Lu Han chooses that moment to come into the lounge and plop down on the couch, sprawling his legs across Jongin’s as Baekhyun stands, dragging Chanyeol toward their shared bedroom in order to escape Jongdae, who’s leaning on Zitao’s shoulder and laughing so hard there are tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

“Ferrets,” Kyungsoo repeats dully, like someone had just sacrificed eight kittens to a pagan god right in front of his eyes and he’s afraid he’ll never feel happiness again.

No one moves to stop their escape, and Minseok even offers a lewd whistle to their backs, which has Zitao looking even more confused and Kevin pressing a weary hand to his forehead, Yixing patting him comfortingly on the back.

Jongin watches them go, content with Lu Han’s casual twining of their fingers together as Chanyeol closes the door behind him. He still hasn’t gotten either of them, Chanyeol or Jongdae, back yet for their constant mocking, but it can wait. Jongin’s got the time.

Besides, Jongin’s left Chanyeol a little surprise.

As discreet as Chanyeol and Baekhyun think they are, Jongin’s known, since that terrible day at the beginning of November, that Chanyeol’s got a thing for Baekhyun in snapbacks, and even more importantly (and tragically), he knows which hat Chanyeol likes Baekhyun in the most, because Chanyeol moans things like “turn the bomb logo toward me, Baek” when Baekhyun’s fingering him. They aren’t the two loudest members of EXO-K for nothing.

That’s why Jongin had cut it into shreds and left the remains scattered across Chanyeol’s hotel bed, so Chanyeol would see it the moment he turned on the lights.

Fuck that hat, Jongin thinks blissfully, as he leans his his head against Lu Han’s, antlers bumping Lu Han’s cheek and slipping off his head. He turns up the TV volume to drown out the anguished wails from Chanyeol as Baekhyun tries his best to console him.

“So I really like these antlers,” Lu Han whispers, as a hand slips up Jongin’s shirt to tease at the skin of his waist. “You should keep them. For later. I might make it worth your—and Crong’s, too, of course—while.”

Jongin nods, and wonders if Lu Han will make him wear them as he fucks Jongin from behind. Jongin doesn’t think he’ll mind.

In fact, it makes him a little excited. But—“You still can’t call my penis Crong.”

“Watch me,” Lu Han says, cupping Crong in his palms, and Jongin forgets why he minded in the first place.

“We’re still here,” Minseok says from the other couch, looking mildly affronted. Jongdae’s hiding a smile. “And by the way, you two still owe me replacements for those sheets you soiled last time. They were my favourite set,” he mourns.

“Buy him hot pink ones,” Jongdae pipes in. “Hot pink is the new black.”

Lu Han looks like a little kid in a candy store. “Hot pink sheets,” he says, trying to keep the excitement out of his voice. “White would look very good on pink...if you get my drift.”

“No,” Minseok says, as realisation dawns on him, but it’s too late.

—

(Lu Han ends up buying Minseok those hot pink sheets from the Hello Kitty store in Seoul when they get back. They’re decorated nicely by an overexcited Crong two days later.

Cutting up Baekhyun’s snapback also doesn’t turn out as well as Jongin had hoped. By the next week, Baekhyun’s taken to wearing beanies, and Jongin wants to throw himself off a cliff from all the sounds coming through the paper-thin walls of the dorm.)

END